DINING AT A SENIOR FACILITY
Among the myriad of features exhibited by humans, is its nature to be territorial. This propensity is manifested on many levels, even in the course of dining. Consider the facility that houses the aged where a family of people who judge themselves to be friendly, gracious, civil beings gather at mealtimes to dine together. One might guess that the main topic of discussion would be the menu. After the denizens are seated, servers take their orders and soon everyone is engaged in the fine art of ingesting food. The din of conversations mixed with laughter engulfs the ambience. All is well in paradise, until….
A new resident appears at the doorway, hoping to see some one she knows, or, if not that, maybe a gesture from a diner welcoming her come join them. When none of that happens, the new kid on the block gingerly enters the dining area looking for an empty seat where she hopes to meet some of the regulars. Finally, she spots a vacant chair and makes a move to occupy it. Instead of a welcome, she is accosted by a stringent cry that warns not to sit there because that space belongs to so and so.
The freshman resident had been clearly advised by the saleslady as well as by other members of the staff that “open seating” is the reigning policy of the institution. Actually, the policy is more like, “not in my neighborhood.” Each new resident undergoes something along the line of this experience when first entering the dining room. The level of sensitivity varies with each human, which is revealed in such cases as this. Some never recover from the very rude introduction afforded them when first entering the restaurant.
Eventually, most find a niche and settle in, where, overtime, come to regard a specific seat as “theirs.” And the show goes on and on. Then there are those who find a small table for two where they are able to sit by themselves to be free of the abuse they initially experienced. For those that are extremely territorial, if they arrive and find some one in “their” seat they either flip and make a scene or assault the occupant with a demand that they vacate the seat immediately, noting that they have been sitting there forever.
Occasionally, management will lecture the diners on the necessity of respecting the “open seating” policy, which once again falls on deaf ears and is met by frosty looks. Wars have been fought over territorial matters. The courts are often used to settle such disputes. But at a gathering of family members around the table, the pecking order reigns. Some well meaning sole suggested that the facility employ a maitre’ d of sorts to bring the diners to a suitable place. Getting management to hire an additional staff member is akin to asking the U.S. to return California to Mexico. Asking for budget changes is the biggest no-no, since it always involves taking something away from something else.
The long and short of it is to accept reality that man is basically a territorial animal!
DINING AT A SENIOR FACILITY
Among the myriad of features exhibited by humans, is its nature to be territorial. This propensity is manifested on many levels, even in the course of dining. Consider the facility that houses the aged where a family of people who judge themselves to be friendly, gracious, civil beings gather at mealtimes to dine together. One might guess that the main topic of discussion would be the menu. After the denizens are seated, servers take their orders and soon everyone is engaged in the fine art of ingesting food. The din of conversations mixed with laughter engulfs the ambience. All is well in paradise, until….
A new resident appears at the doorway, hoping to see some one she knows, or, if not that, maybe a gesture from a diner welcoming her come join them. When none of that happens, the new kid on the block gingerly enters the dining area looking for an empty seat where she hopes to meet some of the regulars. Finally, she spots a vacant chair and makes a move to occupy it. Instead of a welcome, she is accosted by a stringent cry that warns not to sit there because that space belongs to so and so.
The freshman resident had been clearly advised by the saleslady as well as by other members of the staff that “open seating” is the reigning policy of the institution. Actually, the policy is more like, “not in my neighborhood.” Each new resident undergoes something along the line of this experience when first entering the dining room. The level of sensitivity varies with each human, which is revealed in such cases as this. Some never recover from the very rude introduction afforded them when first entering the restaurant.
Eventually, most find a niche and settle in, where, overtime, come to regard a specific seat as “theirs.” And the show goes on and on. Then there are those who find a small table for two where they are able to sit by themselves to be free of the abuse they initially experienced. For those that are extremely territorial, if they arrive and find some one in “their” seat they either flip and make a scene or assault the occupant with a demand that they vacate the seat immediately, noting that they have been sitting there forever.
Occasionally, management will lecture the diners on the necessity of respecting the “open seating” policy, which once again falls on deaf ears and is met by frosty looks. Wars have been fought over territorial matters. The courts are often used to settle such disputes. But at a gathering of family members around the table, the pecking order reigns. Some well meaning sole suggested that the facility employ a maitre’ d of sorts to bring the diners to a suitable place. Getting management to hire an additional staff member is akin to asking the U.S. to return California to Mexico. Asking for budget changes is the biggest no-no, since it always involves taking something away from something else.
The long and short of it is to accept reality that man is basically a territorial animal!